SUPERNOVA*

Sunday, March 09, 2003

Worrysome

I cant sleep. The problem is of course I staied in bed avoiding people till about four in the afternoon, which was very very bad of me and for me because it meant I had time to think and thinking does not help the situation at all. It doesn't change that its over, or the way it hurts. It's just a knife to the heart mulling it over again and again, chewing on it till it's lost its flavor. But even then the pain doesn't stop.

And I'm worried about Kenny. The poor darling. He's so sweet and wonderful... *sigh* he doens't deserve this at all, he's a good guy really, about as good as they come, even with his flaws, hes sweet and charming, hes so fun to talk to and just bullshit with. He's a good guy. *sigh* All the good ones are taken... or gay... or both.

Chris was such a sweetie Friday night when I was so low. I mean I was still crying, but it was because it was Chris the fact I was crying was ok. *shrug* He says the sweetest stuff. Like that Im his goddess and his muse, and his guiding light, that even if I don't know if Im there when things are hard and thats important. That Im there when the world is cold... maybe I am... but I just feel like it never changes, that I should be doing so much more to help people. The other scary part is Chris and Gabi see me, and while I keep this wall up, keep this part of myself hidden away, they SEE it.... but they're still there and that confuses me simply because most people get tired and walk away.

Im just so tired anymore... I dont even know what to do with myself

xoxo SJ at 11:38 PM.

About Me

Name ♥ Sara
Birthday ♥ o1//o2
Horoscope ♥ Aquarius
School ♥ Of Hard Knocks

Currently

Listening to ♥ Blue October Reading ♥ Reservation Blues

Links

♥ Vintage Vanity
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♥ Vanity Fiction
♥ Profile Vanity

Playlist

♥ Wazoo Sings
♥ Chealsea Genzano
♥ Lennon Murphy
♥ Imogen Heap
♥ Frou Frou
♥ Bess Rogers
♥ Regina Spektor
♥ Will Hoge
♥ Lyden
♥ Kyte
♥ Josh Ritter
♥ Amos Lee
♥ David James